April Dykman

If you're panicked because you still haven't thought of the perfect gift for the people on your Nice List, you'll be relieved to know you don't need to spend as much time as you might think looking for something thoughtful. You also don't need to run up your credit card bill.

Why? Because neither of these things is likely to be appreciated by the gift-getter.

In fact, a 2008 study from Stanford University researchers found that spending a lot of time and money to select a gift doesn't make a bit of difference to the recipient. According to Francis J. Flynn, an organizational psychologist at Stanford, the price of a gift is more important to the giver than the getter. (Plus, most recipients actually prefer cash or something from a gift registry, such as their Amazon wish list.)

I had a conversation with a friend, we'll call him Joel, who had two job offers. One was a low-stress 9-to-5 gig but paid $10,000 less than the other offer, which would require longer hours and greater responsibility. He didn't like a lot of things about the higher paying position, but he accepted the offer because it was more in line with the salary at his last job.

In the months that followed, he was regularly putting in 12-hour days at the office and working Sundays. My guess is that it was at least 60 hours per week, and that's being conservative. His gut instinct was right — he wasn't enjoying the new job. Continue reading...

Historically, personal development has been a big part of Get Rich Slowly. Back in 2012, founder J.D. wrote, "I'm a firm believer in personal development. Self-improvement is part of living a rich life. In fact, when I started this blog … the self-improvement category was one of the first I implemented."

But not so long ago, I'd never read a self-help or personal development book. In fact, I avoided that section of the bookstore -- it was all too woo-woo and mushy for me. Then I got hooked on yoga, and I read a lot of woo-woo titles, like "Living the Mindful Life" and "Yoga and the Quest for the True Self." Gross, right?! (But I loved them both.)

Fast forward to today, and I've read a lot of personal development books, even non-yoga ones. I've paid for several online business courses that also tackled issues like how to stop feeling guilty and how to stand tall and own your pricing. Continue reading...

I spend a lot of money on food. (More than I spend on my mortgage.)

Part of it is need, of course. But much of it is want, because I'm both an enthusiastic cook and a health nut. I view food as a cross between health care and hobby. And I know I'm fortunate to be in a position to buy things like freshly pressed olive oil and porcini mushrooms. I know that not everyone has that option. For some people, food is about survival. They have to stretch their food budget as far as they possibly can. Sometimes they go to bed hungry.

Being Realistic

From time to time, I read GRS comments asking for advice for people who are struggling just to make ends meet. They can barely afford to eat, let alone save a six-month emergency fund or open a Roth IRA.
Comments like those always stay with me, but I've shied away from writing about those topics because I feel awkward doling out advice on something I know nothing about. I don't know what it's like to struggle to put food on the table. I'm not a teacher or a social worker who witnesses struggles like that.

On Monday at 8:30 a.m., I found myself at the veterinarian's office -- where, unknowingly, I would spend the next three hours.

The night before, my cat Mia threw up at least five times. In the morning, I found her wedged into a corner of the bathroom. I could tell how she felt just by looking at her.

I called the vet's office near my house right when they opened, hoping to get her an appointment as soon as possible. I was relieved when they said they could see her in an hour.

Today I present the second and final installment of my property tax saga -- the informal hearing. (You can check out the first post here.)
To briefly recap, I'm a new homeowner and my assessed property value shot up by 31 percent from last year. So that, along with the fact that I have a tax-protesting father to please, landed me in County Appraiser Brad's cubicle for an informal hearing.
The bad news
First, County Appraiser Brad pulled up three comparable properties, meaning they were in my general area and fairly close in size, year built, etc.
"Well," he said, "the thing is, you bought right before we hit a seller's market. So you got a great deal, but now you can see that similar properties in your area sold for much more, because a seller's market means higher sales prices."
He showed me the comparables, and how the values compared to my house when adjusted for the market and differences in square footage and other improvements.
"So you can see here that what your property is assessed at is actually lower than the average of these comparables," he said.
Hmm. This wasn't looking good.
"Okay," I said. "But I thought that property taxes on a homestead couldn't increase by more than 10 percent from one year to the next. That's what I read on the county's website. Does that not apply here?"
"Were you living in the house on January 1 of last year?" he asked.
"No, we closed on January 18."
"Well, you have to be living in the home from January 1 for that 10 percent rule to apply."
"Huh," I said. "So I miss it by 17 days and my taxes can go up 31 percent? That is sneaky!" (I said this in jest, and it seemed to amuse him.)
Knowing that I didn't really have an argument on those points, I moved on.
My Hail Mary
"Okay, Brad, but I have this other issue," I said. "When my septic system was inspected, the inspector said she recommended a full replacement. The system is 40 years old, too small by today's standards, and it had a leak. When she found out that the city was annexing our area, she said that repairing the leak would suffice until city sewer was available."
County Appraiser Brad asked for the septic inspection report, which I handed over.
"Well," he said, "the problem is that the septic is working right now."
"So I would have to have a non-functioning septic system right now to get my property value lowered?" I asked. This seemed kinda crazy to me. If the septic wasn't working, I'd of course have to have it replaced or fixed immediately. The point was that the thing was running on borrowed time.
"Okay, do you have an estimate to have it replaced?" he asked.
"No, we're not going to replace it," I said. "We're going to hook up to the city sewer now that it's available."
"Do you have estimates to do that?"
Ugh. No, I didn't. I knew I should have done that, but I just plain forgot. Also, the city just finished installing the pipes on our street not too long ago.
"We're just now in a position to have the work done, so no, I don't have estimates with me," I said. "I could get that this week…"
"You would have had to have brought it in today," he said.
"I've talked to my neighbors, and they've paid between $8,000 to $12,000, depending on how far back their house is from the street," I said. (This was 100 percent true, but I knew that without an estimate in hand, my argument was pretty weak here…)
"Okay, how about this?" he said. "Since you don't have estimates, I'll split the difference and take off $5,000."
"Sold!"
"You drive a hard bargain, April Dawn."
The recap
So $5,000 off isn't too bad. I certainly felt it was worth my time, especially because next year my assessed value could go up as much as 10 percent. That means that keeping the value as low as I can saves me money now and in the future.
In review, the best thing I did was to bring documentation about a major repair/replacement issue -- the septic system. On the other hand, my biggest mistake was not getting written estimates before my hearing for connecting to city sewer. Had I done that, I probably would have been able to lower the assessed value even more. Lesson learned!
One last thing…
Finally, I want to touch on something that I should have explained better in my first post about property taxes.
In the comments on my previous post, some readers had questions about whether it's a good thing to have your assessed value lowered.
"It seems like if you are planning to sell in the next few years, it would be better to have it assessed higher," wrote one reader, "or am I looking at it wrong?"
And reader "cd" had a great explanation:
"Your tax appraisal value and your market value are different things. I don't think many people use the property tax amount as a gauge for how much to pay for a home. Also, the appraised value is what your home was worth last year. In our county, tax appraisals can vary widely (always lower) than what homes actually sell for. Supply and demand should dictate what your home is worth, and your buyer will be required to get a third party appraisal in the selling process anyway by a company that does not assess values for taxation.
"Most importantly, getting the value lowered works the same as compound interest. If you get it lowered by 5 percent one year, that's less you pay every year forward. In addition, if they raise prices as a percentage of your current home value, then shaving dollars off that value saves you money in future increases as well. It's a no brainer for a few hours of work."
That actually clarified a couple of things for me too!
So, readers, that's what the property tax protest process was like for me. I'm happy with the result, especially because I think County Appraiser Brad was being pretty lenient. And that reminds me of one final tip: Be nice. Appraisers are people too, and they're not out to screw you over.
On that note, maybe don't accuse the appraiser of being sneaky, although it seemed to work out okay for me. It's a judgment call, really.

You know all those great tactics to save huge chunks of cash -- the tactics that don't require you to scrimp and save? I'm talking about things like lowering the APR on your credit card or getting a better deal on your car insurance -- paying less for the stuff that's kind of a drag to pay for in the first place.

Well, as a new homeowner, I've been working on lowering one of those no-fun expenses: property taxes.

Two weeks ago, I wrote about how I was surprised that my assessed house value was 31 percent higher for 2014 than it was in 2013 -- and that I had filed the paperwork to protest that assessment.

Over a year ago, I bought my first home. And while I'd been warned about the extra expenses that come with homeownership, there were still some surprises.

I don't mean the "unexpected" costs of property taxes and repairs -- expenses that are often covered in articles about new homeownership. "Surprise! There's no landlord to come fix your garbage disposal." Is that really a surprise to anyone, though?

No, what I'm talking about are the less obvious expenses -- the ones that new homeowners probably aren't thinking about when they sign the closing documents and get the keys to their new home. Here are some of those less obvious expenses that took me by surprise in the last year.

When someone has to make funeral arrangements, they often look to the funeral home for help. They select one of the three coffins suggested by the funeral home. Often it's part of a mid-priced package deal, one that includes pretty much everything you need, and then some. And in a lot of ways, it makes sense that we turn to the experts, especially if we've never had to make funeral arrangements before.
But there's a big problem with relying on a funeral home to help you make decisions: The people advising you have a vested interest in getting you to spend more.

A Sales Pitch at a Funeral Home

A funeral home is a business. And like any business, the pricier the arrangements, the more money they make. They're there to sell their products and services. Never was that made more clear to me than when my friend passed away quite suddenly last fall.
I remember sitting in the funeral home, listening to the director wrap up the viewing and direct us to the church.
And then he launched into an awkward sales pitch.
I wish I could remember it word for word, but it was a rough day so I can't. I do remember that he offered condolences, but he sounded scripted and monotone. I remember that he asked us to remember their funeral home in the future. I remember being creeped out by hearing a funeral home's sales pitch at my friend's funeral.
Now, that doesn't necessarily mean than the funeral home director was doing anything wrong, other than being weird and insensitive. But he did get one point across: This is a business.
And just like any type of business, there are some funeral homes that genuinely care about their customers, and there are some who choose to take advantage of people at a time when they're most vulnerable.
For instance, CNN Money reported that in 2011 the FTC did a spot-check of funeral homes and found that "nearly one in four had serious violations … involving their failure to properly disclose prices" and misleading customers about federal and state law. They also found "industry training tools … [that] reveal funeral pros sharing tips on how to hook grieving families into going over their budgets and to divert them from buying cheaper merchandise elsewhere."
So if you select a funeral home just because someone recommended it or because it's close to home, you have a one-in-four chance of doing business with a shady funeral home.
And speaking of how people select a funeral home, often, they don't shop around, which could cost them thousands of dollars. CNN Money also reported that the cost of a traditional funeral varies widely. For instance, a funeral in Atlanta could cost $3,890 or $11,595, and those two quotes were from funeral homes within a five-mile radius of each other.

Why Families End Up Overpaying for Funeral Services

We know we should shop around, just like any other purchase.
The problem is that shopping for funeral services isn't just like any other purchase. It's an emotional time. Often, family members are in shock. Grief, by itself, can be all-consuming. Add to that all of the arrangements, everything that has to be done in just a few days' time: decisions, flowers, gathering photos, dealing with certain family members (you probably know the ones), and a whole slew of unexpected expenses. Maybe they've never had to make funeral arrangements before. They're lost and overwhelmed.
They also might be pressured into paying more. "Funeral directors say you don't want to skimp because funerals aren't just about the deceased," reports Terry Sheridan for FOX Business. "The ritual involved in burying a loved one provides support and healing to the family, they say. But consumer advocates caution that this is how funeral directors make a living."
And in addition to the emotional aspects, most people simply don't know their rights. (I didn't before writing this article!) For instance, some funeral homes will tell you that you have to buy the coffin directly from the funeral home, which goes against the Funeral Rule. Or they'll say that a certain service is required by law, when in fact the FTC does not require the service at all.

I spend almost as much on groceries as I do on my mortgage.
Now, before you spit your coffee all over your keyboard, you should know that my mortgage is pretty low, lower than what some of my friends pay in rent. And for me, "groceries" includes all of the extras one buys at grocery stores, like paper towels and soap and the latest issue of the weekly tabloid.
(Kidding! I have zero interest in the tabloids. Especially now that none of them cover the bat boy or alien baby adoptions.)
Anyway, non-food expenses aside, I still spend a lot of money on groceries. Part of it is need. We do need to eat. Part of it is want, since food and cooking is a hobby of mine. I make cuts in other places in order to afford things like fresh-pressed olive oil. And part of it I view as a health expense -- things like antibiotic-free meat and organic strawberries.
The thing is, I know I'm lucky to be in a position to afford it. Yes, I prioritize food and health in my spending, so that helps. But not everyone can do that. You can't prioritize organic avocados over, say, paying the rent or paying for childcare.
For instance, check out this post by TomInTexas on the PaleoHacks message board:
"The wife and I are having to cut costs as I'm quitting my job to go back to school. I'll still have some income, but less than half of what I make right now. As such, cuts have to be made, and it looks like the 'unnecessarily high' cost of my paleo diet is in the crosshairs. (I've recently gone paleo, she didn't.)
"After more than two months … I feel great. But today I had my first non-paleo meal in a while: Lentils and some chicken. 15 minutes later I was bent over the commode revisiting my lunch. Now I feel horrible. And I'm hungry again, 1.5 hours after I ate.
"Moral is at a bit of a low. Any ideas on how I can keep the cost … on the low end? I live in a small apartment, so buying half a cow, etc. is not an option. Based on my stomach's response to lunch, neither is rice and beans."
Traditional advice isn't practical
Now, this post isn't about the paleo diet per se. I don't personally follow any diet plan. I chose TomInTexas's quote because it gets to the heart of the financial aspects of trying to eat a "clean diet," whatever that means to you. These aspects are often disregarded by people who espouse these special diets.
Usually when you're talking to a health nut about the expense of eating healthy, they say things like "cut other expenses to afford it" or "consider it a medical expense." Or they offer the advice TominTexas mentions: "Buy half a cow."
But TomInTexas is on a very restricted budget. He can care about his health until the grassfed cows come home, but that won't magically put food dollars in his bank account. And he can't buy in bulk because he lives in an apartment.
Plus, his significant other isn't on board. She doesn't share his views on diet, and that's a difficult situation when his food expenses have increased and his income has decreased. She has a right to be concerned about their finances.
So what can Tom do to keep eating in a way that makes him feel better while keeping to a tight budget?
Decide what matters most
The solution is to prioritize. You may not be able to afford a "perfect" diet, whatever that means to you, but you can make choices where it matters most.
Here's a round-up of some of the best advice I've read about what to prioritize and how to stretch your budget.
Cut the fancy supplements, powders, and special drinks. If you have to watch your budget, think about cutting the $50 protein powder and have some eggs for breakfast instead. Ditto the special drinks. "Don't drink your calories," writes Anthony Vennare at Hybrid Athlete. "Avoid soda, juice, and energy drinks. Stick to water, tea, and coffee." (Cheaper and healthier!)
Don't throw your food budget in the trash. If your produce often goes bad before you get a chance to eat it, buy some frozen vegetables. "Sure, I love fresh veggies," writes Steve Kamb of NerdFitness, "but since frozen veggies are picked and then frozen at peak ripeness (and thus most nutritionally dense), they are often a better value while being edible for months longer."
Get the most nutritional bang for your buck. "Target nutrient dense foods, but understand that we're looking for the most economical choices," writes Kamb. "If food A costs $10 and has 50 of nutrient X, we'll pick food B instead, which only provides 45 of X but costs just $2." High on his list? Dark leafy greens, broccoli, eggs, meat, canned tuna, legumes, bananas, and plums.
Cook like your grandma. "After…ditching my go-to Pam cooking spray, I began to research other cooking oils," Rachael Adams, The Freckled Foodie, tells Abel James, the Fat Burning Man. "My favorite early discovery … is to save all the excess grease from cooked bacon, ground pork, and any other meat, and use it to cook your veggies or side-dishes."
Another way to use up everything you buy? Eat the perfectly healthy parts of produce that most people throw out. For instance, you can sauté beet greens and you can steam broccoli stalks.
It's okay to buy less expensive meat. If you want the highest quality of meat but can't afford it, don't sweat it. "If I can't eat grassfed meat, I look for the cleanest meat I can find (no hormones, no antibiotics, etc.)," writes Mark Sisson, author of The Primal Blueprint. Another way to save is by buying the cheaper cuts of meat. For instance, dark meat is cheaper than white meat. Skirt steak is cheaper than ribeye. There's nothing wrong with those cuts, they're just less desirable to the majority of consumers.
Shop sales. Okay, this one is a bit obvious, but it had to be included because sales are hard to come by for non-processed food. Places to look: grocery stores clearing out nearly-but-not-yet expired food, coupons for frozen produce, weekly sales on select cuts of meat, and end-of-day deals at the farmers markets, when vendors are packing up to go home.
As for specific advice for TomInTexas, I would tell him to sit down with his wife and come up with a food budget that works for both of them. Then, he could offer to do the grocery shopping using the tips above to stick to his diet as much as possible, while keeping in mind his wife's food preferences too. If he can find coupons for some of the foods she likes to eat, that would also help him stick to their budget.
What advice would you give TomInTexas? And whatever your diet of choice, what are some ways you eat healthy on a budget?